What Will 2012 Bring?

Will Obama lose in 2012? Who might replace him?

Assuming that Republicans can form a cohesive message, one that adheres to conservative principles of limited government and low taxation, I can foresee only one of two candidates: Mitt Romney or Sarah Palin (and the latter is most definitely my choice). I would like to say that a Palin/Romney ticket would be perfect, but I would rather a more seasoned Washingtonian as a running mate (for either one). John Kyl would be a nice selection at a VP candidate.

That said, it's too early to tell -- we don't even know who will be running against HRH Obama. He will lose in 2012, of that I am certain.

A former state governor with a track record of both independent thought and fiscal conservatism, coupled with a moral compass and an ability to connect with 'everyday' Americans is the person most likely to win. Today we're seeing just such a race unfolding in Massachusetts, as Scott Brown (R) has a lead over Martha Coakley (D) just prior to today's crucial vote for the Senate seat previously held by Ted Kennedy. Scott Brown is not a 'party line' Republican, or a hard-core conservative, but close; he's considered an independent thinker and is wholly against a bloated federal government, which seems to appeal to a great number of the citizens of Massachusetts.

We're seeing what a nobody does once in the office of President, a former 'community organizer' (read: agitator) without ANY governing experience.. capable only of teleprompter-aided soundbites and possessed of an unwavering belief in his own greatness, he thinks he was elected to 'rule' rather than to 'govern'. He's incapable of an original thought which did not come from Saul Alinsky's playbook, intolerant of those with whom he disagrees (both politicians and the citizenry), and utterly out of touch with the needs of the average American.

How's that working out for the country?

Compulsory Health Coverage

Both 'versions' of the idiotic 'health insurance' bill being considered within the House and the Senate mandate fines and/or imprisonment for failure to comply with the dictatorial edict to purchase health insurance.

This would be the first 'forced purchase' in the nation -- also called 'another tax'. It's outrageous, and the population should be up in arms (figuratively for now, literally the closer this gets to passage).

I cannot lay my finger on the article or clause in the Constitution of the United States which permits the federal government to forcibly compel the citizens thereof to purchase a product or service on pain of punishment.

At its heart it's another tax, this time on those who -- for the most part -- can least afford it. If I could afford to purchase health insurance, I would have it; since I cannot, how can the government force me to do so? Something about 'blood from a stone' seems apropos. So the government takes a two-pronged approach: Offer a lower-cost option (called the 'public' option or the 'government' option), while at the same time threatening me with fines and/or imprisonment if I fail to purchase it.

Of course, that sounds just fine-and-dandy to liberals seeking evermore control over our lives, but keep in mind that the 'public' option will be awful. The supply and demand portion of the argument (more patients+fewer healthcare professionals=long lines+substandard care+rationing of services) ought to be enough to squelch the argument for government-run insurance -- but when you add in the compulsion-to-purchase argument, the whole house of cards comes a-crashin' down.

Self-Help in Schools??

In response to this:

Why don´t schools teach people to LIVE?

Instead of teaching people the things they will actually USE in their lives, such as getting a job, dating and marrying, getting a divorce, pension plan, etc. they ONLY teach biology, physics, etc. Shouldn´t they teach BOTH instead?

It´s no wonder self-help books abound and their writers become millionaires.

I penned this:

The job of a school is to teach facts and figures, history and literature -- and in my opinion, how to think and solve problems.

For all of recorded history humans did not require organized education to learn how to get a job, find a spouse, etc. Why NOW do you suppose that anyone needs such help -- or, indeed, self-help books?

In my never-so-humble opinion, the self-help book industry is booming because --
wait for it
-- people feel they need help. Seriously. Dig a little deeper, though. These books, by and large, focus on two discrete areas: How to treat yourself better (or make yourself feel better), and how to understand the opposite gender.

What both of these topics begin to imply, but fall short of saying (or indeed, realizing), is this: We do NOT make ourselves 'feel better' and we do NOT 'understand the other gender' by looking WITHIN for the answers.

We can ONLY do so by looking, and acting, withOUT.

Very few of these books say this, and so people buy the books, try the 'inward-centric' solutions, fall short, and buy new books to try again... all the while not realizing that the approach is completely wrong on its face, and that no 'inward-centric' solution will ever help them to meet their goals.

Why? Because we're all SELF-CENTERED.
We're already so focused on the SELF that no one else exists; not their needs, their personas, their desires, their personalities. Zip. Zilch. Nada.

You want to have a better marriage? Treat your spouse with kindness. ACT in a loving way, every day and in every way. Try it for 2 weeks and see how much better YOU feel, and how much better a marriage you have.

Not married, but feeling blue? Go work in a soup kitchen for an hour or two a day. Donate your time to a battered-women's shelter. Work with underpriviledged children.

The point is to do something outside yourself -- to give of yourself to another, in ACTION and not word, and you will feel better.

But... that would make a really small book, wouldn't it?

In the Silence

In the Silence

Will the silence speak

the words I will not utter?

Do they press out between

the lines of life's expression?

Have they found their way

through the armor that you've worn?

Can you feel them moving

slowly within your veins?

I want to dance with you

in the sunlight's embrace

watch the winds toss your hair

and heighten your skin...

Run with you through grass-filled fields

and celebrate the beauty of creation.

To stand and gaze

from mountain peaks

and in the silence of your arms

know what it means to be alive.

More Thoughts on Marriage

We all know that marriage is difficult. Almost 50 percent of married couples in North America get divorced, which means that one in two couples must be so miserable, they give up. Of the couples that do stay together, how many of them are truly happy? Why would people subject themselves to this institution; what makes it all worthwhile?

One rabbi taught that to begin to understand a concept, you must first define it. The technical definition of Jewish marriage is, of course, the giving of the ring under the chuppah with the expressed intent of marriage, validated by two witnesses. This definition describes the lifetime commitment the couple makes to each other before man and G-d.

But what exactly is the couple committing to? A lifetime together -- for what purpose?

There is another, more philosophical definition of marriage: A lifetime commitment to constantly provide emotional intimacy to your spouse, thereby uncovering your true self and, ultimately, your unique purpose for being created.

Each clause of this definition reveals the foundation of a successful marriage.

A lifetime commitment:
Marriage is meant to last forever. You are committed for the long haul; therefore figure out whatever you need to make it work. When you argue, are frustrated, tired or bored, say to each other: "We are in this together, forever. Let us get through this, because on the other side lies the happiness we both want, the happiness a successful marriage provides."

To constantly:
Marriage takes constant work. A great marriage does not just passively unfold after marrying your soul-mate. Instead, the commitment of marriage is a lifetime of proactive "everydays:"

Everyday I will recommit myself to this person.

Everyday I will make my spouse happy.

Everyday I will communicate with my spouse.

Everyday I will make my spouse feel special.

Everyday I will make my spouse feel that I am the most blessed person in the world to be married to him/her.

Everyday I will unload his/her burden.

Everyday...

(Gratitude + Love) x Communication = Emotional Intimacy.

For a marriage to be successful, it must be the top priority in your life. You must work harder and smarter on your marriage than you do at work, parenting or other relationships, but you will find that the success of this relationship will aid you in all other pursuits. Ignoring your marriage to focus on other things will ultimately create chaos in all areas of your life, not just your marriage.

Provide emotional intimacy to your spouse:
The definition of emotional intimacy is to constantly make your spouse feel that he/she is the most important aspect of your life; it is the key to a happy marriage.
A marriage is a bank account whose currency is feelings; and making your spouse feel fulfilled, happy, loved, cherished, desired and respected are deposits in the account. The emotions of distance, discontent, apathy, feeling secondary, disrespect and being critical are all withdrawals from the account. A happy marriage is one with an abundant emotional bank.

How you make your spouse feel is more important than the reality of the situation. If there is an issue that needs to be taken care of within the marriage, first deal with the feelings and then, once they have been resolved, address the issue itself.

How do you create emotional intimacy? There is an Emotional Intimacy Quotient (EIQ): (G + L) x C = EI, which is (Gratitude + Love) x Communication = Emotional Intimacy.

Gratitude is the awareness of all the kindness your spouse does for you, of which you must recognize. A daily gratitude diary is a great way to get in the habit of noticing. Everyday, add five new things your spouse has done for you and then communicate your appreciation of these kindnesses; this is true gratitude.

Love is the feeling you get when you focus on and appreciate your spouse's virtues, positive attributes and character traits. Your daily gratitude diary can double as a daily love journal. Everyday, list five of your spouse's virtues and communicate them. Express each virtue with the words, "You are... (virtue x)," while making deliberate eye contact. Each day that you communicate gratitude and love will be one in which you experience emotional intimacy.

Thereby uncovering your true self:
Emotional intimacy demands honesty and growth. You cannot be dishonest about yourself with your spouse and be truly intimate at the same time. Emotional intimacy is a growth process, where you are always working to connect at deeper and deeper levels. You need to uncover any hidden layers within you that block the emotional connections to your soul mate. You will begin a journey to places inside yourself that you have never before been challenged to reach; there you will find fears, insecurities and anxieties concealed in the crevices of your subconscious that you will have to work through to achieve greater intimacy with your spouse. Each layer that you remove uncovers more of your true self and character; an intimate marriage is the one place where you cannot hide from yourself.

And ultimately, your unique purpose for being created:
Once your true self is unleashed, your relationship to the outside world begins to change. You will discover deeper meanings in other pursuits. You will transform your environment to reflect, and be in harmony with, your inner self. Honesty and integrity will define you, as love and meaning pursue you. Personal growth will be your determining measure of success. An unbridled passion for life will radiate from you. You will find a gentle peace and begin to understand your special place in the universe. Slowly, your relationship with your Creator will begin to mirror the thriving relationship you have with your spouse.

REACHING THE DIVINE

In teaching the commandment to love God, Maimonides, the 12th century Jewish philosopher and scholar, writes that one's love for God should parallel one's love for a spouse, though the former should be even more intense. One should be "love sick," thinking of your spouse "whether you are sitting or standing, eating or drinking." The connection to your spouse should be so intense that he/she is with you in every aspect -- in your heart, your mind and your soul.

Once you experience this passion through the physical realm of marriage, you have acquired the tools to connect to the spiritual equivalent and create a loving connection with your Creator. Your intimacy with the Divine will be determined by the very depth and intensity of passion you share with your spouse.

Through marriage, you have the potential to uncover who you really are and the unique qualities you possess to share with the world. You have the potential to sincerely connect with another human being without barriers, apprehensions or inhibitions. And emotional portals to connect with the Almighty with boundless passion will await you.

What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility. So, without further ado, the very simple secret to a happy marriage is to remember these things: Spend Quality Time Alone Together.

A long-lasting, happy marriage is about knowing your partner, being supportive, and being nice.

A happy marriage is based on is deep friendship, knowing each other well, having mutual respect, knowing when it makes sense to try to work out an issue, when it is not solvable.

Another important point to a happy marriage is to learn to celebrate gender differences, not compete with them.

The time to begin building a happy marriage is now.

The secret to a happy marriage is selflessness, putting the needs of your wife ahead of your own needs, helping her in little ways.

One of the main components of a happy marriage is that the spouses are able to forgive, that they do not hold grudges or act judgmental towards each other.

True, building a lasting, happy marriage is not easy, but it is certainly possible.
A happy marriage is a new beginning of life, a new starting point for happiness and usefulness.


No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.


Real giving is when we give to our spouses what's important to them, whether we understand it, like it, agree with it, or not.

ACCEPT - the secret of a good marriage.

Attraction

Communication

Commitment

Enjoyment

Purpose

Trust

Either you win or the relationship wins.

The entire sum of existence is the magic of being needed by just one person.


Love is seeking to act for the other person's highest good.


Talking to your man is different from talking to your girlfriend. By and large, a man wants the bottom line. Cut the amount of prelude by approximately ninety percent, and you’ll get it just about right. Instead of saying, “Honey, my mom went in and the doctor diagnosed varicose veins. She’s going to have to get them stripped, which will make it very difficult for her to walk for a couple of weeks. As you know, she lives all alone now, and the only person who can help her is Mrs. Jenkins, who just visits twice a week, on Thursdays and Fridays. Mom’s going to need more help than that.”

Trust me, you’ve probably lost him by that point. Instead, try this: “Honey, my mom is having surgery next week and needs some time to recover. Do you mind if she stays with us for a few days?”

If he wants more information, he’ll ask for it. Keep it short.

Kevin Leman, Making Sense of the Men in Your Life

One member of a couple says (as if this is an excuse for leaving), "I love him (or her), but I am no longer in love."
Love is an action word, I want to say. When was the last time you "loved" him (or her) by your actions? Love is not just a feeling. Love is a verb. We have control over what we do, not what we feel. Similarly, I only have control over what I do – not what my partner does. If I do not like what is happening or how I feel, what can I do differently? As I behave differently, many times do I get a different response? How many times do I take for granted those thoughtful actions or tasks a partner may complete? Do I say thank you? Do I show my appreciation? Do I care enough about my partner to do something they like, just as a love gift – not as a should-do? Do I do these things without expecting something in return? If I expect something in return and do not get it, I will feel resentment, which is poison in a relationship. A gift is only a gift if it has no expectations attached.

Riette Smith

--
The secret to having a good marriage is to understand that marriage must be total, it must be permanent, and it must be equal.


The first duty of love is to listen.


The goal is to have a conversation in a way so that you can have another conversation tomorrow.


Marriage is one long conversation, checkered with disputes.


A good marriage is the union of two good forgivers.

Numerology Reading

Numerology Reading

First, you as a person; the unique individual that you are. This is derived from your Name. It includes your inner urges and desires, and how you present yourself to others.

Your Inner or Soul's Urge

You respond to life from the heart. You want joy and happiness for yourself and for those around you. Inspiration and imagination are yours in abundance. You are something of a dreamer.

Children and pets occupy a special place within.

You enjoy beauty, popularity, and constant activity. What you have is all you ask for.

Life is a game. You enjoy life as it comes, laughing at discouragement or failure, and never letting depression get the upper hand. Even so, there is a reticent side to your nature. You might be living in a world of feeling and emotion.

You fall in Love easily.

You can see beauty everywhere. And you express your own beauty through your varied artistic talents -- painting, sculpting, speaking, decorating, acting, music, writing -- anything with color, form, or rhythm.

Seems you have a lot of friends; often entertaining, broadcasting your energy and your Love, giving everyone a good time. You are probably not unfaithful, but you enjoy flirting. You are kind and obliging. Your friends mean a great deal to you.

Patience and ability to concentrate could be enhanced for your personal benefit.

Your Personality

Others tend to see you as loyal, dedicated, dignified, and honest with a desire to perform the work at hand instead of taking a lot of time for fun and pleasure. You seem to be thrifty, prudent, and orderly.

If you focus overly much on work, others tend to see you as someone in a rut and unable to change habits.

Your self-image can suffer if you do not receive compensation or praise, at least recognition, for your labors.

The practical aspects of your personality can be enhanced by wearing tailor-made clothing of straight lines and good material, neat rather than showy.

Your Quiescent Self

Family, society, country, and civilization are better off because of your tireless efforts and meticulous attention to detail. You are the pillar of society. A staunch patriot. Your rewards are accomplishment, duty, Love, and appreciation.

Your thoughts and pleasure are the creation of firm foundations upon which family and society as a whole can prosper.

Your Destiny or Ultimate Goal

Your destiny is to be one of the educators of the world -- uncovering and understanding the mysteries of life; studying, proving, making sure of facts then writing, teaching, or demonstrating your knowledge to others.

Your quest for knowledge can bring you many unusual experiences and associations. You are intelligent, intuitive, scientific, a thinker, and a sage and you have far-reaching insight. You are an articulate and convincing spokesperson and a perfectionist, and would be at home in any executive position that did not involve machinery or the manufacturing departments.

You enjoy writing, inventing, philosophy, and religions.

-----

Second, the path you are traveling in this life. It is derived from your Birth Date. Here is where you find the type of events that tend to affect you as a person.

Your Life's Path

Your path holds frequent change, variety, travel, and the unexpected with a thorough mingling among humanity. You will grow by adapting yourself to change and uncertainty. Crowds and audiences appeal to you. You are passionately independent. You experience restlessness or impatience when things move along too slowly or when constant repetition becomes monotonous.

You sense that experience is the best teacher and that you learn best while you maintain your sense of individual freedom. You may have a tendency to misuse your freedom with over-indulgence of the senses, but that can be corrected by using your holistic sense of free will to go on to new adventures, and thereby discarding what no longer serves a purpose.

You have an innate ingenuity and can benefit from scientific, inventive, and resourceful people. You are versatile and clever. Things don't stay the same for long where you are.

You can understand all classes and conditions of people and can adapt yourself to unusual circumstances and conditions. Be alert to seize all that is novel and progressive. You profit by contact with other people.

I was never a huge believer in this sort of thing, but I have to admit that the great majority of this is dead-on accurate. As a writer and wedding officiant (minister), as a man... it's just eerie, really.

Never Ending

A cup of coffee, a cigarette...
Some time to dream, and to forget
the way life goes, around and down
(like ashes, floating to the ground).

Of burnt-out hopes and futile tries,
to make it better with anguished cries...
of people all alone, who
have only walls to tell their troubles to.
But walls can't hear and walls can't speak
(hot flowing tear on burning cheek).

The thoughts go round and round again,
in a never-ending chain...
and where Hope once lived
now lives Pain.